Pseudo-feelings.

20.08.2008

I felt used and cheated. You came, you conquered, you sidetracked my objective, you broke my stand and you left. You're selfish and ungrateful. I hate you with every ounce of who I am. I hate myself more for giving you chances to even prove your capabilities which are non-existent. My instincts were right all along. Thank God I havent cross the line. You've always said that we were significant. But let me tell you that I wont hesitate to walk out just like she did to you. I'll give you what you call, your worse nightmare. Honestly, Life is so much easier when you dont "suck up" on me. But hey, the only thing that made me hold on this far is probably due to those memories we shared together.

Arrrggggh. This just has to happen now right? and believe it or not, it brought my anticipation level down. Now, I'm not too sure if im even looking forward to end of exams. I guess everybody have been wanting me to say this: I totally screwed my AN paper on Monday. and I really mean it. SCREWED. Alhamdulillah, Biology paper today was alright. and sorry Arief, if I've made you stress before paper this evening (:

www.dictionary.com

anodyne \AN-uh-dyn\,adjective:

1)Serving to relieve pain; soothing
2)Lacking zest, vigor, etc.; bland; insipid

noun:
1. A medicine that relieves or allays pain.
2. Anything that calms, comforts or soothes disturbed feelings.

I NEED ANODYNE.

Above all that, im getting paranoid all over again. Someone just wouldnt reply my message(s). And the only person that would understand me at this point- Khairul (!!!).

I'm off.